The Naughty Monkey (& the Bad Girl)
While traveling to Zambia and Zimbabwe, Africa, to see Victoria Falls (post & pics coming soon), we were on an early morning game drive hunting animals with our cameras. As with all animal encounter excursions, there is always the possibility of not seeing any animals. On this particular game drive, we left the lodge in the pre dawn darkness with high hopes of encountering animal activity, specifically, that of leopards and lions. We were fortunate to find elephants and giraffes, and being the greedy people we tended to be, we were still looking for those elusive lions. One dum-dum in my vehicle was disappointed after not seeing any lions and commented that “they should keep all the lions in cages and when the people come through on the game drives, they should let the lions out of the cages for the people to see them.” Well. I almost got in a fight with this dum-dum on account of my sarcastic under my breath but still able to be heard comments about these people going to a zoo to see the animals or just maybe staying home if they were so stupid that they thought the wild and free animals were on display for them. Idiots.
After driving around looking fruitlessly for leopards and lions we stopped at a designated rest point where there were picnic tables set up for game drive participants. We weren’t hungry, but I think this stop was to placate the crabby people who wanted to see those lions at any cost. Our drivers put out some coffee and a few muffins for us to snack on and it wasn’t long before the cute and highly entertaining spider monkeys were joining us. Of course we were not feeding these monkeys and all garbage was being picked up and taken out of the area, but these monkeys were super bold and majorly curious; one even jumped up on the picnic table, picked up someone’s unattended coffee mug, and started drinking out of it!!! This little monkey was SO cute!
Now, I totally know better, but I really wanted to make friends with this sweet little monkey so I was squatting on the ground talking to it and trying to get it to come closer to me. I had a ziplock baggie packed with Starbust candy in my pocket and while I was waiting for the monkey to come over to me I was eating some of my candy. Soon the bold coffee loving monkey came right up to me to see (and try to steal) what was in my bag. As I was putting the bag in my pocket, he grabbed the bottom of the bag with his little hands, ripped a hole in the bottom of the bag, and scampered away with one of my wrapped Starburst candies! I was completely taken off guard by how quick he did this….the crafty little candy thief!
A few minutes later another monkey came over to me event though my Starburst candy was now safely zipped in my pocket. I assumed this monkey had been watching the behavior of the other monkey and now was looking for free candy as well. As I was looking closely at this monkey I noticed he had a weird growth on the inside of his jaw as there was a suspicious lump inside his cheek. I felt sorry for him and wondered what was wrong with him. Then I noticed this was the SAME monkey that had stolen my Starburst! I knew it was the same monkey because the candy stealing monkey had a dead ant stuck in his eyebrow fur. So unless there were two monkeys with dead ants in their eyebrows, this was the same monkey. And upon further inspection that weird growth inside that poor little monkey’s cheek? The growth that was in the shape of a perfect square upon further assessment? It was the stolen Starburst candy! That smart little monkey had jammed that piece of candy in his cheek for safe keeping and was coming back for more! I guess he wanted an orange piece instead of a green one.
That stupid bad girl (Moi) certainly should know better than to befriend wild animals just because they are cute. Lesson Learned: Keep your candy secure. Cute monkeys are still wild animals and what if he would have been pissed off and bit me? Or worse, ripped off my face or something? Come on girl, don’t be the game drive idiot….